Batman at 40

Batman at 40

Its going to happen again. Every year, no matter what I do, despite all of my training, my strength, my wealth, my power... It will come every year. 

Next year I turn 40. I leave behind another decade. I think back to what I accomplished, did I accomplish anything? Damien, just 8 years old when we met. The same age I was when I lost my parents, we found each other. The irony is not lost on me. In my next decade of life he will be 18…a man himself. 

I look at myself and I think how did I get here. I look in the mirror and spot a gray hair in my stubble or catch myself in lighting where I say to myself "my god Bruce, you look just like your dad"...a father that you are now older than he will ever be.

I look back at all the amazing things and think to the future….I have fought my war on crime for almost 20 year. I stop whoever, save some lives while others are lost….so many impossible victories and failures. I look to the future and iam terrified. Will I be able to stand against what or who comes next? Have I taught my children everything to help then live their best lives? Have I been a good father? Have i set a good example? Did I make a difference? I, my family and i have lived through so much tragedy; Jason, Barbara, Tim, Dick….are we better for it...are we better because of it. 

I look back to my 20s...just starting out, making mistakes, trying to find my path...my path with all its twists and turns took me into my 30s...I faced new paths, unexpected ones. I had plans but at least now Iam at a point in life where I know that I will face change again...the only constant. I hope I made a difference, I hope I mattered. I do not know what comes next but I know I will live the next decade trying to make the answers to my questions "yes".